5 Reasons NOT To Wake Up At 5am

Take it from me, there are a lot of reasons not to get up early!

1. It's not safe.

Mama always told me not to go out in the middle of the night.

2. It can get you fired.

I once worked (briefly) at a doughnut shop and I had to wake up at 5am to be there by 5:30am. By the second day, I was so exhausted, I fell asleep, face first into the doughnut batter. Needless to say, my boss was very upset and fired me right there on the spot, just as I was untangling my hair from the mixing spoons.

3. It can make you do stupid things.

One time, I had an interview in a huge office building. I was so excited that morning, I woke up bright and early at 5am, wide awake. By noon, I was starting to deflate. When I got to the office building, it had one of those revolving doors that was moving really fast. I stood there for a second to get my timing right, and then I jumped in. My timing must have been a little off, though, because I was in one slot, and my purse was in the other. It took a kind maintenance man and the janitor to unhook my purse and my hair from the jammed revolving doors. Well, needless to say, I didn’t get the job. By the time I got upstairs, they had already hired somebody else.

4. Your hair doesn’t look good when you’re tired. Your hair follicles just don’t wake up that early. So teasing your hair is useless. That’s why you need a lot of cute hair scarves if you have to be at work early in the morning.

5. It can get you fired.

I worked for a few days as a medical assistant at one of the top hospitals in the nation. Though I had no prior experience, they were nice enough to take a chance on me, but the job required, again, to wake up early. For this position, I had to get up at 4:00am to be there by 5:00am. The first day and the second day were both pretty easy, being that the only thing I had to do was pick up all of the doctors’ dry cleaning for them. By the third day, though, they had me wiping down all of the operating tables for the patients. I was so tired from all the sanitizing that I decided to take a little nap and fell asleep on one of the beds. That didn’t go over so well with any of the staff. I was instantly fired and asked never to return – not even as a patient.

In closing, let me just say, the moral of all of these stories is – the early bird doesn’t always get the worm!